©Adrienne Gusoff 2007

Holiday Card Submissions
Adrienne E. Gusoff

last update: February 7, 2016

SOLD
	(This is a perforated, sparkle-covered snowflake with a hole in the top, so it pops out and becomes a tree ornament)
	Rough concept. I'll find/create the photos if chosen
FPG 3689 Vol2
What can I tell ya? This one just write itself. I know you would NEVER publish this card, but it literally makes me laugh aloud every time I read it. Personally, I would send it to every one of my friends! (What can I say? I'm a sick woman!)

Some copy without images: (I have lots of images of women, so if you like copy that requires it, I'll look thru my pictures and give you some options. Don't have too many of Santa.)

(image: drawing of bookshelf, so you can read the spines of the books)

titles: Being Short and Loving It; When He Loves His Reindeer More than You; Dealing with Seasonal Stress; Keeping Your Edge against Cheap Foreign Labor; “If I Have to Make Another Train Set I'm Going to Kill Somebody!”, “How to Cope with a Boss who Knows Everything”, “Naughty or Nice? The Age Old Question.”

Merry Christmas!

(image: Fat lady)

Gussie had consumed the entire gingerbread village like Godzilla chomping through Tokyo , and now she was paying for it…

Happy Holidays

(not sure of image. Gay looking guy, maybe)

You are what you eat

MC you big fruitcake!

(copy only)

Why Santa is Better Than Most of the Men we Know:

1. He knows when you're sleeping and he knows when you're awake, which means he doesn't bother you for sex when you're too tired

2. He never shows up without a gift

3. He always know what you want.

4. He's extremely well-traveled

5. He's great with kids

6. He has years of experience fulfilling women's greatest desires

7. He's always in a good mood.

8. He's an animal lover

9. He has some awesome transportation

10. He can dedicate his 364 days off each year to you.

(sexy woman)

Merry Christmas

To someone who's expert at both ‘naughty” and “nice”

(image of Santa)

Sorry…no gift this year… Some labor issues at my North Pole workshop.

Boy you just can't get good elf these days! Merry Christmas.

(Image: Santa's My Space page)

(see quick'n dirty mockup above)

(Santa)

He knows if you've been bad or good…

Basically, Santa is a big, fat yenta.

Happy Holidays!

(woman)

On the holidays remember, tis better to give than to receive…

Hope you get something for me that makes you feel really, really good!

Merry Christmas